Yet Again!

I have sat in front of the computer for days trying to spill it all out. It is so hard to put into words how I am feeling. I can say I feel ok and cover up the tears or the fear but as I type I can't stop it. I am worried, I am mad, I am happy etc..you get the point.
Over a week ago I was put back into the hospital for the lose of sight thing again. I was petrified and still am. It goes and comes but never with so much pain. I didn't want to speak,didn't want to even tell anyone how much pain I was in. I pushed on like I always do and tried to put on a smile. Then as I was driving with both kids in the car I lost it...BOY was that awful. I made it home as calm as I could and went to bed. I didn't want to be in pain so I thought it I was to go to sleep I would be ok. So I woke up the next morning to find that I was blind again. Tears covered my face as I told my husband that he couldn't go to work. I didn't know what to do. So we call the doctor and she tells me to come in. We drive for about an hour just for her to run a test and tell me yes you can't see. DUH! I am the one who called you and told you that. So then we go home just for me to get worse. I passed out...Oh MY! I am not sure how long I was out but it made Mike very worried. So the next day we go to the hospital and they kept me in for almost a week. When I could see again they told me it was a type of migraine. WHAT? All this for that? I mean I am happy they think they found the cause but how do I know for sure this time? I am now home with LOTS of meds to take and the anxiety of the not knowing. I am trying so hard to live each day out and trust in God. I know he is with me and I can feel it. Through all this I have found out that I have friends that i can count on. I love each of them VERY much!